Stressed About A Co-Worker? Here's How to Deal With Them

Stressful and difficult colleagues are very common--they can either be bosses, teammates, team leaders, clients or even your work friends. And sometimes, we have no other choice but to work with them directly to deliver the job.

When you have to deal with different personalities on a daily basis, you might need to harness some new interpersonal skills, because difficult co-workers are not all the same. Although this is a norm in every workplace, you still can work together harmoniously.

Here are some ways on how you can deal with difficult co-workers:

1. Stay calm
   No matter how much your buttons are being pushed, try to keep your cool as much as possible. Though it can be hard especially if things are getting personal between you and a co-worker. Remind them that you are here to do a quality job and that personal feelings shouldn't get in the way of your work.
   
   If you show more control over a conflict, you might just get more respect from your work peers. No one really wants to work with someone who loses their temper very easily.
2. Get perspective from others
   Perhaps you're thinking if you're the only one who feels the way you do. However, it is also likely that your other colleagues have dealt with the same situation as you. Try to get a perspective from others, allow them to give a different take, and get some advice. Note that this doesn't mean that you have to add fuel to the fire by insinuating gossip about this difficult co-worker behind their back--so avoid that at all costs.
3. Focus on the job and ignore them
   This doesn't mean that you are allowing yourself to be treated with disrespect. But at the end of the day, this difficult co-worker has nothing to do with you outside of work. They are not your friend nor do they pay your bills. Show them how determined you are to finish the job and that their behavior isn't something worth paying attention to.
4. Understand what is making them act that way
   Although no one should be bringing their personal issues at work, sometimes negative emotions can get the best of them and so can you. Maybe this person is going through something or they have a situation at home. Try to do this by initiating a light-hearted conversation with them and ask what you can do to help. This allows you to manage your emotions and not jump to conclusions.
5. Boss up!
   Perhaps the reason why they are treating you unfairly or you have a rough co-working relationship is because they see you as an easy target to pick on. And you, as a professional, should refuse to be treated this way. You shouldn't get abused for your kindness. Now, this doesn't mean that you have to act mean towards them, but instead, show them that you mean business and have no time for unpleasant behavior. For instance, if they are due to submit something, tell them to make sure to have it submitted on time. This act may spur a shock to them, but at least they know what you're about.
6. Evaluate them or go to H.R.
   Sometimes the best way to let them understand their difficulty is if it's coming from an authoritative figure in the workplace. This isn't just the human resources, this could be your team leader and supervisor. This way, the higher-ups can take matters into their own hands without directly involving you. This means that your complaint will stay anonymous or be just a general evaluation of their performance.
   
   You will come across a toxic co-worker at least once in your life, and this is something you should come prepared for. All you need to have is some seriously thick skin, a good attitude, and professionalism.

About JobStreet.com

JobStreet.com is a leading online job board presently covering the employment markets in the Philippines, Malaysia, Singapore and Indonesia. JobStreet.com currently services over 300,000 companies and over 20 million jobseekers in its database.

About SEEK Asia

JobStreet.com and jobsDB are part of SEEK Asia, which is the leading online employment market place in Asia. SEEK Asia covers 6 countries namely Hong Kong, Indonesia, Malaysia, the Philippines, Singapore and Thailand.

SEEK Asia is the extension of the Australian Securities Exchange listed company called SEEK. The company's purpose is to help improve people's lives through a better career.

For more information about this article, or to schedule an interview with JobStreet.com Philippines, please email [email protected].